Princess Shmincess

Princess and Lolita are often synonymous to some people, and Princesslyness is frequently the topic of many a blog post. Today, when I went to check my blog roll I was surprised (well, not that surprised) to find two different blogs talking about how Lolita makes them feel like a princess, and both posts, as well as many of the previous posts I have seen about Lolitas and princesses, can pretty much be summed up with the tagline from the movie A Little Princess: "Every girl everywhere is a princess." Well, that's great for those girls that enjoy that, but what about those who don't want to be princesses? I'm not just talking about girls who would rather slay dragons and go on adventures, because it is argued that princesses can slay as many dragons as they want, I'm talking about the girls who simply don't like having such a term as "princess" applied to either themselves, or the fashion they wear.

I don't feel the need to prove myself to my inner 8 year old Caro-chan by living the fantasy filled life that I wished for when I grew up. Hell, if I did feel the need to prove myself to her I would be living in the Addams Family house, and riding my trained white tiger to astronaut/famous author/circus performer work every day.

I never wanted to be a princess when I was little, and I certainly don't now just because I wear Lolita. I don't want to whistle while I work or learn to bake or giggle politely behind a lace fan. I am much more prone to bitching openly, ordering Chinese takeout, and laughing loudly at inappropriate moments. I don't see what building yourself a Disneyesque (or otherwise) fantasy world really has to do with wearing petticoats and designer dresses from Japan. I would much rather live my life as it is, with some frilly dresses thrown in for fun, than to construct for myself an elaborate fantasy as an excuse to wear fancy clothes and like pretty things.

Princesses may need to stick together, but the rest of us, the dragon slayers, the princes, the adventurers, the wicked queens, the brooding vampires, the just-plain-old girls, the grrlz, the boys, the bois, and even the regular every-day grownups who are perfectly happy being a grownup, well, we're fine on our own.

18 comments:

  1. You are so right. Fashion is fashion and just because i'm wearing a petticoat doesn't mean I want to be a little princess or want to look younger.

    I just don't like how everyone wants to tar us all with the same brush.

    Your my heroine Miss Caro!

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  2. For some reason that last paragraph warms my heart. >_>

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  3. I believe in everything that you just said ^^, when i was little yes i like the idea of princess, castles, prince, etc, but I know that is not reality O_o i mean, we are girls who want to express the inner child, but not everyone haves the same taste and dreams, it is a cliché the princess style ejejeeje; I like to be princess-warrior XD.

    take care.

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  4. I think it's that Lolita fashion certainly draws that kind of crowd. Girls, like myself, with that mindset. Much like the gamer community draws in those with an escapist mindset. The lolita community is certainly very varied in its members, with different girls appreciating different aesthetics and activities. But I think it is only natural for girls who enjoy the princess thing to be drawn to a fashion that reflects their personal aesthetics. I don't think anyone is saying that to being a lolita and being a princess have to go hand-in-hand. And I would imagine that many of the princess types have days when they feel more like a vampire, or a circus performer, or an adventurer. I certainly never assumed that everyone who dresses in lolita shares the same love for princess aesthetics as I do. In fact, that's what is so great about the community! There's such a wonderful variety of bright and imaginative girls each with so many varied talents and hobbies. And that's great! Variety is the spice of life afterall ^.^

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  5. I agree. There's a princess subset, Hime, for a reason.

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  6. I've been lurking on your blog for about a month now and I love your perspectives on things. I lean more towards the "Lifestyle" Lolita myself, but the word "princess" is not a part of my lifestyle. Prior to finding your blog, I actually worried that I wouldn't fit into the Lolita mainstream because I didn't share this need for cuteness and sparkly tiaras. Nice to know there are others out there who don't fit that either!

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  7. I like being called a princess just as much as I like being called a bitch. Yes, princess could mean an elegant, spunky heroine. Yes, bitch could be an assertive, alpha woman. But I still can't get past the original connotations of either epithet. Blah, I have so much to say, but I have to go write about finches now.

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  8. Not really to your point truly - but as a little girl I never wanted to be a princess. As I grew older, and even to this day, I think it would be awesome to be a King. Not a princess, not a Queen, but a King. My obsessions know no reasoning.

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  9. This was mostly just my personal ramblings, as a Lolita non-princess, on a subject that often comes up in Lolita conversation. I'm certainly not saying that people think every Lolita should be a princess. I hope you didn't think I was! I can clearly see why girls who enjoy a modern day Princesses mindset are drawn to the fashion. I mean what other fashion doesn't bat an eye if you wear a crown XD

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  10. The subject has been brought up alot lately, hasn't it? I gothca, I love ramblings. It's great to read rants from all sides ^_^
    Haha, so true so true, and that makes me happy because it lets me actually get to wear the collection of crowns I've acquired XD

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  11. Thank you! I would make a poor heroine though, I don't know how to ride a horse, be a spy, fly a jet, or any of the stuff good heroines do.

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  12. I'm the same way! There are many things I enjoy and hobbies I have that I share with Lifestyle Lolitas, and I love Lifestyle Lolita blogs and stuff because they're usually full of silly crafts and ramblings about tea that I enjoy, but I just don't fit (lol at all) into the cute pink sparkle world that so many Lifestyle Lolitas love. So while I could call myself a Lifestyle Lolita, I just choose not to because of that.

    I'm glad to hear that my blog helped you with that ^^ There are lots of different kinds of Lolitas, and while some things are more popular or just louder and more well known than others, I'm a believer that there really is no "Lolita mainstream". Just put on a silly dress and you're instantly ooooone of uuuuus XD

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  13. Thank you! Seriously, I don't live in a magical fantasy land of wonder, nor do I want to. I never dreamed of being a princess when I was little. A pirate, a knight, an astronaut, Indiana Jones, sure. The poof is just to throw people off more when I bust out my ass-kickery. -_^

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  14. I don't take this idea of being a princess so literally. To me it does not mean being a Disney Princess. It means that there are no limits to my dreams. I can be whatever I want to be. Isn't that what being a Lolita what it is all about?
    Of course, there are times that I love being treated as a real Princess. A little fantasy mixed with a dose of reality.

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  15. When I was a little girl, I wanted to be Han Solo.

    I dislike the "princess" mindset myself, so I made myself Queen.

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  16. Well, I guess I'm one of those girls who definitely fits the "princess/dreamer" mold, and it did draw me to lolita. But I was the little girl who was dressed in pink frills with her sparkly tiara on dancing to heavy metal, so I think there is room for some leeway for us princess enthusiasts.

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  17. agree 100%
    Thank you for this statement.

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  18. I liked the idea of being a princess but I REALLY wanted to be a mermaid! If you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say "a mermaid!" I dunno what in my little child mind led me to believe this was a career path that I could only achieve when I got older.

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